[Inhaling and exhaling deeply]

[Inhaling and exhaling deeply]

[Male] OK... Here we go. Focus.

Speed. I am speed.

[Cars whizzing past]

One winner, 42 losers.

I eat losers for breakfast.

[Car accelerating]

Breakfast.

Wait, maybe I
should have had breakfast.

A little breck-y could be good for me.
No, no, no, stay focused. Speed.

[Cars whizzing]

I'm faster than fast.
Quicker than quick.

I am lightning!

[Pounding on door]

[Male] Hey, Lightning! You ready?

[

Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready

[engine revving]

[Engine revs]

[Crowd cheers]

Ka-chow!

[Cars zooming]

[Cars whooshing]

[Both scream]

[All cheer]

Get your antenna balls here!

Go, Lightnin'!

- Whoo!
- You got that right, slick. [whistles]

[Air wrench whirring]

Uh! [screams]

[Engine revs]

- [Male] Welcome back to the Dinoco 400.
- [Crowd cheers]

I'm Bob Cutlass, here
with my good friend, Darrell Cartrip.

We're midway through what may
be an historic day for racing.

Bob, my oil pressure's
through the roof.

If this gets more exciting, they're
gonna have to tow me outta the booth!

Right, Darrell.

[Bob] Three cars are tied
for the season points lead,

heading into the final race
of the season.

And the winner of this race will win
the season title and the Piston Cup.

Does The King, Strip Weathers,

have one more victory in him
before retirement?

[Darrell] He's been Dinoco's golden boy
for years!

Can he win them one last Piston Cup?

[Bob] And, as always, in the
second place spot we find Chick Hicks.

He's been chasing
that tailfin his entire career.

[Darrell] Chick thought
this was his year.

His chance to finally emerge
from The King's shadow.

But the last thing he expected was...
Lightning McQueen!

[Bob] You know, I don't think
anybody expected this.

The rookie sensation
came into the season unknown.

But everyone knows him now.

[Darrell] Will he be the first rookie
to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco?

[Bob] The legend, the runner-up,
and the rookie!

Three cars, one champion!

[Breaks screeching]

No you don't.

- [Chuckling]
- Hey!

- [Tires squealing]
- [Crowd booing]

What a ride!

[Chuckling]

Go get 'em, McQueen!
Go get 'em!

[Female] I love you, Lightning!

- Dinoco is all mine.
- [Screaming]

[Darrell] Trouble, turn three!

- Get through that, McQueen.
- [Bob] Huge crash behind the leaders!

[Crowd gasps]

[Screaming]

[Giggling]

- [Grunts]
- [Gasps]

[Both screaming]

[Bob] Wait a second, Darrell.
McQueen is in the wreckage.

[Darrell] There's no way the rookie
can make it through!

Not in one piece, that is.

[Exhaling]

Yeah!

Lightning! Oh!

[Darrell] Look at that!
McQueen made it through!

[Bob] A spectacular move
by Lightning McQueen!

Yeah! Ka-chow!

McQueen! McQueen! McQueen!
McQueen! McQueen! McQueen!

Yeah, McQueen! Ka-chow! [honking]

[Bob] While everyone
heads into the pits,

McQueen stays out to take the lead!

Don't take me out, coach.
I can still race!

[Air wrench whirring]

[Chuckling] What do you think?
A thing of beauty.

- McQueen made it!
- [Chick] What?

He's not pitting!

You gotta get me out there!
Let's go! Get me back out there!

McQueen's not going into the pits!

[Darrell] The rookie fired his
crew chief. The third this season!

- [Bob] Says he likes working alone.
- Go, go!

Looks like Chick
got caught up in the pits.

Yeah, after a stop like that,
he's got a lot of ground to make up.

Get ready, boys,
we're coming to the restart!

[Crowd cheers]

Come on, come on, come on!

We need tires now!
Come on, let's go!

- No, no, no, no! No tires, just gas!
- [Male] What?

You need tires, you idiot!

[Darrell] Looks like it's
gas-and-go's for McQueen today.

[Bob] Right. No tires again.

[Darrell] That's a short-term gain,
long-term loss,

but it's workin' for him. He obviously
knows somethin' we don't know.

[Cars whizzing]

[Bob] This is it, Darrell. One lap to go
and Lightning McQueen has a huge lead.

He's got it in the bag.
Call in the dogs and put out the fire!

We're gonna crown us a new champion!

[Crowd cheers and whistles]

[Screaming]

- Checkered flag, here I come!
- [Tire blows]

[Darrell] No! McQueen's blown a tire!

[Bob] And with only one turn to go!
Can he make it?

- You fool!
- [Grunts]

[Male] McQueen's blown a tire!
He's blown a tire!

Go, go, go!

- [Grunting]
- [Tire blows]

[Darrell] He's lost another tire!

- King and Chick come up fast!
- [Bob] They're entering turn three!

Come on. [grunting]

I don't believe
what I'm watching, Bob!

Lightning McQueen
is 100 feet from his Piston Cup!

[Gasping]

[Growling]

[Bob] The King and Chick
rounding turn four.

[Darrell] Down the stretch they come!
And it's, and it's...

- It's too close to call! Too close!
- I don't believe it!

Lightning!

- The most spectacular, amazing...
- I don't believe it!

...unequivocally, unbelievable ending
in the history of the world!

- And we don't know who won!
- Look at that!

[Tape jittering]

[Slow motion drone]

- That's very close to call.
- Can we play that again?

Hey, no cameras! Get outta here!

We're here in Victory Lane,
awaiting the results.

We're here in Victory Lane,
awaiting the results.

McQueen, that was a risky move,
not taking tires.

Tell me about it!

Are you sorry you didn't have
a crew chief out there?

Oh, Kori. There's a lot more to racing
than just winning.

I mean, taking the race by a full lap...
Where's the entertainment in that?

I wanted to give folks a little sizzle.

- Sizzle?
- Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief?

No, I'm not.
'Cause I'm a one-man show.

What? Oh, yeah, right.

That was a confident
Lightning McQueen.

Live from Victory Lane,
I'm Kori Turbowitz.

- Get outta the shot.
- Yo, Chuck.

Chuck, what are you doing?
You're blockin' the camera!

- Everyone wants to see the bolt.
- What?

- Now, back away.
- That's it! Come on, guys.

- Whoa, team! Where are you going?
- We quit, Mr. One-Man Show!

Oh, OK, leave. Fine.

How will I ever find anyone else
who knows how to fill me up with gas?

[Crowd laughs]

- Adios, Chuck!
- And my name is not Chuck!

Oh, whatever.

Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen!

Seriously, that was some
pretty darn nice racin' out there.

- By me!
- Oh, yeah.

- Zinger!
- Welcome to the Chick era, baby!

The Piston Cup...
It's mine, dude. It's mine.

Hey, fellas, how do you think
I'd look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue!

In your dreams, Thunder.

Yeah, right. Thunder?
What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"?

You know, 'cause thunder
always comes after lightning.

Ka-ping! Ka-pow!

- Who knew about the thunder thing?
- I didn't.

- Give us the bolt!
- That's right.

Right in the lens.

- Show me the bolt, baby!
- Smile, McQueen!

- Show me the bolt, McQueen!
- That's it!

[Electronic music]

[Crowd chattering]

That was one close finish.
You sure made Dinoco proud.

Thank you, King.

Well, Tex, you've been
good to me all these years.

It's the least I could do.

Whatever happens, you're a winner
to me, you old daddy rabbit.

Thanks, dear.
Wouldn't be nothing without you.

Kch-i-ka-chow!

- I'm Mia.
- I'm Tia.

[Both] We're, like, your biggest fans!
Ka-chow!

I love being me.

- [Police] OK, girls, that's it.
- We love you, Lightning!

[Chuckles]

Hey, buddy.
You're one gutsy racer.

Oh, hey, Mr. The King.

You got more talent in one lug nut

than a lot of cars has got
in their whole body.

- Really? Oh, that...
- But you're stupid.

- Excuse me?
- This ain't a one-man deal, kid.

You need to wise up and get
a good crew chief and a good team.

You ain't gonna win
unless you got good folks behind you,

[voice dwindling] and you let them
do their job, like they should.

- Like I tell the boys at the shop...
- A good team.

- Yeah...
- [electronic music]

Ka-chow! Ka-pow!

[Crowd cheering]

[Screaming]

[Cheering]

Oh, Lightning!

If you figure that out
you just gonna be OK.

Oh, yeah, that...
That is spectacular advice.

Thank you, Mr. The King.

- [Fanfare]
- [Bob] Ladies and gentlemen,

for the first time
in Piston Cup history...

[revving] A rookie
has won the Piston Cup.

Yes!

[Bob]... we have a three-way tie.

- [Crowd cheers]
- [Cameras flash]

[Chuckling] Hey,
that must be really embarrassing.

But I wouldn't worry about it.
Because I didn't do it!

[Bob] Piston Cup officials
have determined that a tiebreaker race

between the three leaders
will be held in California in one week.

Well, thank you! Thanks to
all of you out there! Thank you!

[Whispering] Hey, first one to
California gets Dinoco all to himself.

No, not me!
No, you rock, and you know that!

Oh, yeah! Whoo!

Yep! All right! Got it!

"First one to California
gets Dinoco all to himself."

Oh, we'll see
who gets there first, Chick.

Huh?

- Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie.
- I don't want to talk about it.

Let's go, Mack. Saddle up.
What'd you do with my trailer?

- I parked it at your sponsor's tent.
- What?

Gotta make your personal appearance.

No. No! No, no, no, no!

Yes, yes, yes!
Lightning McQueen here.

And I use Rust-eze Medicated
Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula!

Nothing soothes a rusty bumper
like Rust-eze.

Wow! Look at that shine!

Use Rust-eze and you too
can look like me!

Ka-chow!

[Both laughing]

I met this car from Swampscott.

He was so rusty
he didn't even cast a shadow.

- You could see his dirty undercarriage.
- [Crowd laughs]

[Groaning] I hate rusty cars.
This is not good for my image.

They did give you your big break.
Besides, it's in your contract.

Oh, will you stop, please?
Just go get hooked up.

- Winter is a grand old time.
- Of this there are no ifs or buts.

[Male 1] But remember,
all that salt and grime...

Can rust your bolts and freeze your...

Hey, look! There he is!

Our almost champ!

[Male 1] Get your rear end in here.

Lightning McQueen,
you are wicked fast!

- That race was a pisser!
- You were booking!

- Give me a little room.
- You're my hero!

Yes, I know. [chuckles]

"Fred." Fred, thank you.

He knows my name.
He knows my name!

Looking good, Freddie!

Thanks to you, Lightning,
we had a banner year!

We might clear enough
to buy you some headlights.

You saying he doesn't have headlights?

That's what I'm telling ya.
They're stickers!

Well, you know,
racecars don't need headlights,

because the track is always lit.

Yeah, well, so is my brother,
but he still needs headlights.

[Laughing]

[Forced laughter]

- Ladies and gentlemen,
- [both] Lightning McQueen!

[Crickets chirping]

Free Bird!

You know, the Rust-eze Medicated
Bumper Ointment team

ran a great race today.

And remember, with a little Rust-eze...

[whispering] And an insane
amount of luck,

...you too, can look like me.
Ka-chow.

- Hey, kid.
- We love ya.

And we're looking forward
to another great year.

Just like this year!

Not on your life.

- Don't drive like my brother!
- Yeah, don't drive like my brother!

California, here we come!

Dinoco, here we come!

[

[Birds chirping]

[Phone ringing]

[Moaning] Oh... oh... uh,
I needed this. Hello?

[Male] Is this Lightning McQueen,
the world's fastest racing machine?

Is this Harv,
the world's greatest agent?

And it is such an honor
to be your agent

that it almost hurts me to take
ten percent of your winnings.

Merchandising. And ancillary rights in
perpetuity. Anyway, what a race, champ!

I didn't see it,
but I heard you were great.

Thanks, Harv.

Listen, they're giving you 20 tickets
for the tiebreaker thing in Cali.

I'll pass 'em on to your friends.
Shoot me the names.

- You let Harv rock it for you, baby.
- Right. Friends.

Yes, there's...

OK, I get it, Mr. Popular.

So many you can't even narrow it down.
Hey, when you get to town,

you better make time
for your best friend!

Break bread
with your mishpocheh here!

That'd be great!
We should totally...

OK, I gotta jump, kid.
Let me know how it goes. I'm out.

- [Dial tone hums]
- [Sighing]

- [Melodic beeping]
- [Wheels squeaking]

[Lightning] What? A minivan?

Come on, you're in the slow lane.

This is Lightning McQueen
you're hauling here.

Just stopping off
for a quick breather, kid.

- Old Mack needs a rest.
- Absolutely not.

We're driving all night till we
get to California. We agreed to it.

All night? May I remind you
federal DOT regs state...

Come on, I need to get there
before Chick and hang with Dinoco.

[Mack groans]
All those sleeping trucks.

Hey, kid,
I don't know if I can make it.

Oh, sure you can, Mack.

Look, it'll be easy.
I'll stay up with you.

- All night?
- All night long.

[Snoring]

[Engines slowing]

[Snoring, gasping, blubbering]

[Grunting]

[Snoring] Uh!

[Blubbering]

- [Rap music]
- [Engines revving]

[Sniffing] Ah-choo!

[Laughing]

- Hey, yo, D.J.
- What up?

- We got ourselves a nodder.
- [Chuckling]

[

Pretty music. [snoring]

Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man.

- Right back at ya!
- Yeah!

- Oops! I missed.
- You going on vacation?

[All laugh]

[Snoring]

[Snoring]

- [Chuckling]
- [Sniffling]

- Oh, no, Snot Rod...
- He's gonna blow!

Ah... Ah... Ah-choo!

Gesundheit!

One should never drive while drowsy.

- [Tires squealing]
- [Horns honking]

- [Honking loudly]
- [Screaming]

- Uh! Ah!
- [All honking]

[Breathing heavily] Mack!

- [Grunting]
- [Horns honking]

Mack!

Mack!

Hey, Mack! Mack!

Mack!

Mack, wait for me! [engine revving]

[Tires squealing]

Mack!

[Bell ringing]

[Horn bellowing]

Mack! Mack!

Mack! Mack...

...wait up! [coughing] Mack.

Mack! Mack!

What? You're not Mack.

Mack? I ain't no Mack!
I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake!

[Peterbilt]
Turn on your lights, you moron!

Mack... The Interstate!

[Tires squealing]

- [Engine roaring]
- Huh?

Not in my town, you don't.

[Siren wailing]

Oh, no.

- Oh, maybe he can help me!
- [Sheriff backfiring]

He's shooting at me!
Why is he shooting at me?

[Backfiring]

I haven't gone this fast in years.

[Grunting] I'm gonna
blow a gasket or somethin'.

Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine!

What in the blue blazes?

Crazy hot-rodder.

[Siren continues wailing]

[
My Heart Would Know]

[Buzzing]

[Water hose turning on]

[Snoring]

I'm telling you, man,
every third blink is slower.

The sixties weren't good to you,
were they?

[Car backfires]

[Sirens blasting]

What? That's not the Interstate!

- [Sheriff backfires]
- Ah! Oh!

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!

- [Screaming]
- [Tires screeching]

No, no, no, no, no, no!

Ow!

I'm not the only one seeing this, right?

- Incoming!
- Whoa, man.

- No!
- Hey!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

My tires!

- [Grunting]
- [Gasping]

- [Screaming]
- [Gasping]

- [Tires squealing]
- [Cables vibrating]

[Yelling]

[Shouting]

[Screaming]

- [Cables whizzing]
- [Straining]

Fly away, Stanley. Be free!

[Gasping]

[Breathing heavily]

Boy, you're in a heap of trouble.

[Sighing]

We're live at the Los Angeles
International Speedway

as the first competitor,
Lightning McQueen,

is arriving at the track.

Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl?

What's your strategy?

- [Crowd gasps]
- [Cameras clicking]

What? Did I forget
to wipe my mud flaps?

McQueen's driver arrived in California,
but McQueen was missing.

- McQueen was reported missing.
...to race an unprecedented...

[male] Sponsor stated
they have no idea where he is.

I hope Lightning's OK. I'd hate
to see anything bad happen to him.

I don't know what's harder to find,
McQueen or a chief who'll work with him!

[German accent] Lightning McQueen
must be found at all costs!

They're all asking the same question:
Where is McQueen?

[Groaning] Oh, boy.

Where am I?

- Mornin', sleepin' beauty!
- Ah!

Boy, I was wonderin'
when you was gonna wake up.

Take whatever you want!
Just don't hurt me!

A parking boot?
Why do I have a parking boot on?

- What's going on here? Please!
- [Chuckling] You're funny.

I like you already. My name's Mater.

Mater?

Yeah, like "tuh-mater,"
but without the "tuh".

- What's your name?
- You don't know my name?

Uh...

No, I know your name.
Is your name Mater too?

What?

Look, I need to get to California
as fast as possible. Where am I?

Where are you? Shoot!

You're in Radiator Springs.

The cutest little town
in Carburetor County.

Oh, great. Just great!

Well, if you think that's great,
you should see the rest of the town.

You know,
I'd love to see the rest of the town!

So if you could just open the gate,
take this boot off,

you and me, we go cruisin',
check out the local scene...

- Dad-gum!
- How'd that be, Tuhmater?

- Cool!
- Mater!

What did I tell you
about talkin' to the accused?

To not to.

Well, quit your yappin' and tow this
delinquent road hazard to traffic court.

Well, we'll talk later, Mater.

[Chuckling] "Later, Mater."
That's funny!

Ah!

[Sheriff] The Radiator Springs
Traffic Court will come to order!

Hey, you scratched my paint!
I oughta take a blowtorch to you, man!

You broke-a the road!
You a very bad car!

- Fascist!
- Commie!

Officer, talk to me, babe.
How long is this gonna take?

I gotta get to California, pronto.

Where's your lawyer?

I don't know. Tahiti maybe.
He's got a timeshare there.

When a defendant has no lawyer,
the court will assign one to him. Hey!

Anyone want to be his lawyer?

Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff!

All rise! The Honorable
Doc Hudson presiding.

Show-off.

- May Doc have mercy on your soul.
- [Door banging]

- [Gasping]
- All right,

I wanna know who's responsible
for wreckin' my town, Sheriff.

I want his hood on a platter!

I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots!
No, check that.

I'm gonna put him in jail till
the jail rots on top of him,

and then I'm gonna move him
to a new jail and let that jail rot.

I'm...

Throw him out of here, Sheriff.

I want him out of my courtroom.
I want him out of our town!

- Case dismissed.
- Yes!

Boy, I'm purty good
at this lawyerin' stuff.

Sorry I'm late, Your Honor!

Holy Porsche! She's gotta be
from my attorney's office.

Hey, thanks for comin',
but we're all set.

- He's letting me go.
- He's letting you go?

Yeah, your job's pretty easy today.

All you have to do now is stand there
and let me look at you.

Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase.
Me, you, dinner. Pi-cha-kow!

- What the...? Ow! Oh!
- Ka-chow!

- Please!
- I know. I get that reaction a lot.

I create feelings in others that
they themselves don't understand.

- [Revving]
- Agh! Ow!

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you?

A little bit, but I'll be all right.

OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge.

Do what you gotta do, baby.
But listen. Be careful.

Folks around here are not firing on
all cylinders, if you know what I mean.

Ka-ching!

Ah!

I'll keep that in mind.

- Hey there, Mater.
- Howdy, Sally.

- Hi, folks!
- Good morning!

You know her?

She's the town attorney and my fiancee.

What?

Nah, I'm just kiddin'.
She just likes me for my body.

You look great. You do something
different with your side view mirrors?

What do you want, Sally?

[Sighing] Come on, make this guy
fix the road. The town needs this.

No. I know his type. Racecar.

That's the last thing this town needs.

OK, I didn't want to have to do this,
Doc, but you leave me no choice.

Fellow citizens, you're all aware
of our town's proud history.

Here she goes again.

Radiator Springs,
the glorious jewel

strung on the necklace
of Route 66, the mother road!

It is our job and our pleasure
to take care of the travelers

- on our stretch of that road.
- Travelers? What travelers?

Ignore him.

But how, I ask you,
are we to care for those travelers

if there is no road
for them to drive on?

- Luigi, what do you have at your store?
- Tires.

And if no one can get to you?

I won't sell any... tires.
I will lose everything!

- Flo, what do you have at your store?
- I have gas.

- Lotsa gas!
- OK boys, stay with me.

And, Flo, what'll happen if no one
can come to your station to buy gas?

I'll go outta business and...
we'll have to leave town.

What's gonna happen if Flo
leaves town and closes her station?

- [All] Without gas, we're done for!
- What?

Don't you think the car responsible
should fix our road?

The only guy strong enough
to fix that road is Big Al!

Lizzie, Big Al left like, 15 years ago.

Then why are you bringing
him up, you lemon?

Oh, he can do it.

He's got the horsepower.
So, what do you want him to do?

[All] Fix the road!

- Because we are a town worth fixing!
- Yeah!

[All cheer]

[Honking] Order in the court!

Seems like my mind
has been changed for me.

- [All] Yeah!
- No!

[VW van] Nice ruling.

Oh, I am so not taking you to dinner.

[Chuckling] That's OK, Stickers.
You can take Bessie.

Man, you get to work with Bessie!

I'd give my left two lug nuts
for somethin' like that.

Bessie? Who's Bessie?

[Gurgling]

This here is Bessie,
finest road-pavin' machine ever built.

I'm hereby sentencing you
to community service.

You're gonna fix the road
under my supervision.

What? This place is crazy!

I know this may be
a bad time right now,

but you owe me $32,000
in legal fees.

What?

We're gonna hitch you up to Bessie,
and you're gonna pull her nice.

You gotta be kidding me.

You start there where the road begins.

You finish down there
where the road ends.

[Mater] Holy shoot!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!
How long is this gonna take?

Well, fella does it right,
should take him about five days.

Five days?

But I should be in California
schmoozing Dinoco right now!

Then if I were you,
I'd quit yappin' and start workin'!

- Hook him up, Mater.
- Okay-dokey.

[Grunting]

[Tires squealing, engine revving]

[Lightning] Freedom!

Maybe I should've
hooked him up to Bessie...

...and then...
then took the boot off.

Whoo-hoo!

Goodbye, Radiator Springs,
and goodbye, Bessie!

California, here I come! Yeah!

Oh, feel that wind.

Yes!

[Sputtering]

No. No, no, no.

No, no, no, no, no. Outta gas?

How can I be outta gas?

[Chuckling] Boy, we ain't
as dumb as you think we are.

[Stuttering] But how did,
how did... you...?

We siphoned your gas
while you were passed out.

- Ka-chow.
- Ow, ow, ow, ow.

- Gentlemen.
- Sheriff.

Hey, Sheriff.

- Why here?
- [Italian] Sono sempre stati qui.

- They were better before.
- Stai sempre a parlare.

- Guido!
- Red, can you move over?

I want to get a look
at that sexy hot rod.

You know, I used to be
a purty good whistler.

I can't do it now, of course,
on account of sometimes

I get fluid built up
in my engine block,

but Doc said he's gonna fix it.
He can fix about anything.

That's why we made him the judge.

Boy, you shoulda heard me on
Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow.

Now, I'm not one to brag

but people come purty far
to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow".

Oh!

- Aw, man, that's just great!
- Hey, what's wrong?

My lucky sticker's all dirty.

Ah, that ain't nothin'.
I'll clean it for ya.

- [Snorting, hacking]
- No, no, no!

That won't be necessary.

Hey! Hey, big fella!
Yeah, you in the red!

I could use a little hose down.
Help me wash this off.

Where's he goin'?

Oh, he's a little bit shy, and
he hates you for killin' his flowers.

I shouldn't put up with this.

I'm a precision instrument
of speed and aerodynamics.

- You hurt your what?
- I'm a very famous racecar!

You are a famous racecar?
A real racecar?

Yes, I'm a real racecar.
What do you think? Look at me.

I have followed racing my entire life.
My whole life!

Then you know who I am.
I'm Lightning McQueen.

- Lightning McQueen?
- Yes! Yes!

I must scream it to the world!

My excitement from the top
of someplace very high!

- Do you know many Ferraris?
- No, no, no, no, no.

They race on the European circuit.
I'm in the Piston Cup!

- [Lightning] What?
- Luigi follow only the Ferraris.

Is that what I think it is?

[Sally] Customers.

Customers!
Customers, everyone! Customers!

- [Sally] OK!
- Customers?

[Sally] Been a long time.
Remember what we rehearsed.

Make sure your
"Open, please come in" signs are out.

You all know what to do.
All right, nobody panics. Here we go!

Van, I just don't see
any on-ramp anywhere.

- Minny, I know exactly where we are.
- Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere.

- Honey, please.
- [Sally] Hello.

Welcome to Radiator Springs,
gateway to Ornament Valley.

Legendary for
its service and hospitality.

How can we help you?

- We don't need anything, thank you.
- Ask for directions to the Interstate.

There's no need to ask for directions.
I know where we're going.

He did the same thing
on our trip to Shakopee.

We were headed over there
for the Crazy Days, and we...

- OK. Really. We're just peachy, OK?
- What you really need

is the sweet taste
of my homemade, organic fuel.

No, it doesn't agree with my tank.

- Just trying to find the Interstate.
- Good to see you, soldier!

Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut
for your government surplus needs.

- Honey, surplus!
- We have too much surplus.

I do have a map
over at the Cozy Cone Motel.

And if you stay, we offer a free
Lincoln Continental breakfast.

- Honey, she's got a map.
- I don't need a map! I have the GPS.

- Never need a map again, thank you.
- How 'bout somethin' to drink?

Stop at Flo's V-Eight Cafe.
Finest fuel on Route 66.

No we just topped off.

And if you need tires,
stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires,

home of the Leaning Tower of Tires.

- We're trying to find the Interstate.
- But you do need a paint job.

Ramone will paint you up right.
Hey, anything you want!

- You know, like a flame job.
- No thanks...

Maybe ghost flames!

You like old school pinstripin'?
Von Dutch style?

- [Both gasp]
- Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch.

[Chuckling] OK, no.
We're gonna be going now, OK?

Ow!

[Laughs] A little somethin'
to remember us by, OK?

- OK!
- Come back soon, OK?

I mean, you know where we are!
Tell your friends!

[Van] OK! Yes. You bet.

Thanks again, folks.
Bye-bye now.

Psst! Psst!
Hey! Hey, hey, hey!

- I know how to get to the Interstate!
- Do ya?

- Minny, no.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, not really. But listen.

I'm Lightning McQueen, famous racecar.
I'm being held against my will.

I need you to call my team,
so they can come rescue me

and get me to California in time for me
to win the Piston Cup. Understand?

- [Locks beeping]
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

No, it's the truth! I'm telling you!
You gotta help me! Don't leave me here!

I'm in hillbilly hell!
My IQ's dropping by the second!

I'm becoming one of them!

- [Lightning echoes]
- [Sighing]

OK, don't worry.
They know where we are now.

They'll tell friends. You'll see.

[Male DJ] We'll be back
for our Hank Williams marathon...

- That's good.
...after a Piston Cup update.

[Kori] Still no sign of Lightning
McQueen. Chick arrived in California

and today became the first car
to spend practice time on the track.

[Chick] It's nice to get out here
before the other competitors.

You know, get a head start.
Gives me an edge.

[Electronic music]

[Laughing]

Hoo-hoo-hoo!

Ha-ha!

Yeah!

[Crowd shouting and cheering]

[Girls chattering and giggling]

Hey, McQueen...
Eat your heart out.

[Gasping] Oh!

Let me get this straight.

I can go when this road is done.
That's the deal, right?

- That's what they done did said.
- OK. Outta my way.

I got a road to finish.

[Grunting and revving]

- He's done!
- Done?

- Uh-huh.
- It's only been an hour.

- [Bessie groans]
- Ah, I'm done. Look, I'm finished.

Say thanks, and I'll be on my way.
That's all you gotta say.

[Mater] Whee-hoo!
I'm the first one on the new road!

Oh!

[Vibrating] It rides purty smooth.

- It looks awful!
- Well, it matches the rest of the town.

- Oh!
- [Blubbering]

Red.

Who do you think you are?

Look, Doc said when I finish,
I could go. That was the deal.

The deal was you fix the road,
not make it worse.

Now, scrape it off!
Start over again.

Hey, look, grandpa,
I'm not a bulldozer. I'm a racecar.

Oh-ho-ho-ho!

Is that right? Then why don't we
just have a little race? Me and you.

- What?
- [Chuckling] Me and you. That a joke?

If you win, you go and I fix the road.

If I win, you do the road my way.

Doc, what're you doin'?

I don't mean to be rude here,

but you probably go zero to sixty in,
like, what? Three-point-five years?

Then I reckon
you ain't got nothin' to worry about.

You know what, old-timer?
That's a wonderful idea. Let's race.

[Sheriff] Gentlemen,
this will be a one-lap race.

You will drive to Willy's Butte,
go around Willy's Butte and come back.

There will be no bumpin',
no cheatin', no spittin',

no bitin', no road rage, no maimin',

no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin',
no backstabbin', no road-hoggin',

and no lollygaggin'.

Speed. I'm speed.

Float like a Cadillac,
sting like a Beemer.

[Luigi laughs]

My friend Guido, he dream to give
a real racecar a pit stop.

- Peet stop!
- Uh... [chuckles]

The race is only one lap, guys.

Uno lappo! Don't need any help.

- I work solo mio.
- Fine. Race your way.

- No pit stoppo. Comprendo?
- OK.

Gentlemen...

...start your engines!

[Engine sputters]

[Revving furiously]

- JHijole! Check that out!
- Whoa.

Great idea, Doc.
Now the road will never get done.

Luigi?

[Chuckling] On your mark, get set...

Uno for the money,
due for the show,

tre to get ready, and quattro
to... I can't believe it. Go!

[Giggling]

[Cheering]

Huh?

Doc... the flag means go.

Remember the fl...
Here we go. Go.

Doc, what are you doing, man?

Oh, dear. It would seem
I'm off to a poor start.

Well, better late than never.
Come on, Mater.

- Might need a little help.
- Uh... OK.

You got your tow cable?

Well, yeah,
I always got my tow cable. Why?

[Doc] Oh, just in case.

[Yelling] Ow! Ow!
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

No, no, no, no, no!

- Oh, man!
- Whoa.

- Ow!
- [Fillmore] Bad trip, man.

[Revving]

Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac
or was that stingin' like a Beemer?

- I'm confused.
- [Chuckling]

[Doc] You drive like you fix roads.

Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater.

[Gasps] Ah!

I'm startin' to think he knowed
you was gonna crash!

Thank you, Mater. Thank you.

I can make a little turn on dirt.

You think?

No. And now I'm a day behind.
I'm never gonna get outta here!

Hey, ese!
You need a new paint job, man!

- [Lightning] No, thank you.
- How 'bout some organic fuel?

- That freak juice?
- [Lightning] Pass.

Whoo! Watchin' him is makin' me thirsty.
Anybody else want somethin' to drink?

Nah, not me, Flo.

I'm on one of them there special diets.

I'm a precisional instrument
of speed and aero-matics.

"You race like you fix roads."

[Grunting] I'll show him.
[Grunting] I will show him!

- [Tar splattering]
- Oh, great! I hate it!

- Hate, hate, hate, hate it!
- [Chuckles] Music. Sweet music.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

[Lightning]
Radiator Springs, a happy place!

OK, Bessie, you think that's funny?

Great! I'm talking to Bessie now!
I'm talking to Bessie!

Wow.

[Mater] Mornin', Sally!

Hey, look at this here fancy new road
that Lightnin' McQueen done just made!

Yes! Uh, amazing!

Whoa-ho! Yeah! [sighing]

Oh, Ramone! Mama ain't
seen you that low in years.

I haven't seen a road like this
in years.

- Well, then let's cruise, baby.
- Low and slow.

[Italian] E bellissima! It's beautiful!

Guido, look, it's-a like
it was paved by angels.

Boy, I tell you what.

I bet even the roads on the moon
ain't this smooth.

Doc, look at this!

Shoulda tossed him into
the cactus a lot sooner, huh?

Well, he ain't finished yet.
Still got a long way to go.

Guido, look at Luigi!

This is fantastico!

That looks like fun!
Mater, I got dibs, next turn!

Hey, Luigi, this new road
makes your place look like a dump.

That crazy old devil woman.

[Sighs] Oh!

She's right!

- Ah!
- Guido!

Huh. That punk actually did a good job.

Well, now... where the heck is he?

Sheriff!
Is he makin' another run for it?

No, no. He ran outta asphalt
in the middle of the night,

and asked me if he could
come down here.

All he's tryin' to do
is make that there turn.

[Lightning] No, no, no, no! Oh, great.

Perfect turns on every track
I've ever raced on.

Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself
a quart of oil at Flo's.

I'll keep an eye on him.

Well, thanks, Doc.
I've been feelin' a quart low.

[Engine revving]

[Screaming]

[Spitting]

This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt.

Oh, great. What do you want?
You here to gloat?

You don't have three-wheel brakes,
so you got to pitch it hard,

break it loose and then
just drive it with the throttle.

Give it too much, you'll be
outta the dirt and into the tulips.

So you're a judge,
a doctor and a racing expert.

I'll put it simple.

If you're goin' hard enough left,
you'll find yourself turnin' right.

Oh... Right. That makes perfect sense.
Turn right to go left! Yes! Thank you!

Or should I say, "No, thank you"?

Because in Opposite World,
maybe that really means, "Thank you"!

Crazy grandpa car. What an idiot!

[Groans]

[Lightning] Turn right to go left.

Hmm...

Whoa!

- Oh!
- [Car crashing]

- Ow! Oh, that...
- [cactus crashing]

[Screaming] Ow!

Turn right to go left.
Guess what. I tried it.

You know what? This crazy thing
happened... I went right!

You keep talkin' to yourself,
people'll think you're crazy.

- Thanks for the tip.
- What? I wasn't talkin' to you!

- Oh, Guido, e bellissimo!
- Che cosa?

- It looks great! This is great!
- Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo.

[Grunts, passes gas]

Oh, Lord.

- [Chuckles]
- [Sheriff] Mater!

I need you
to watch the prisoner tonight.

Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute.
What if he tries to run again?

Just let him run outta gas
and tow him on back.

- But keep an eye on him.
- Yes, sir!

[Groaning] Oh...

While I'm stuck here
paving this stinkin' road,

Chick's in California schmoozing Dinoco.

My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Who's touching me?

You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix.

You make-a such a nice new road.

You come to my shop.
Luigi take-a good care of you.

Even though you not a Ferrari.

You buy four tires,
I give you a full-a size spare

- absolutely free!
- Look, I get all my tires for free.

[Chuckling] I like your style, eh?

You drive the hard bargain.
OK. Luigi make you a new deal.

You buy one tire,
I give you three for free!

[Flo] Oh, would you look at that?

Ramone, Ramone!

[Luigi] Then Luigi make you
a new new deal.

[Lightning] No, no, no, no.
Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you.

- No, no, no, no. No.
- This is it. My last offer.

You buy one tire, I give you
seven-a snow tires for free!

Done. You interested, you call me.
You know where I am.

[Exhales deeply]

Ah!

Stop! Let me...

Oh, Red, you missed a spot.
See it right there?

- No! No!
- On the hood right there.

Stop, stop! That's cold!

Help! Please! Stop!

- [Coughing, sputtering]
- Thanks, Red.

What was that for?

- Do you want to stay at the Cozy Cone?
- Huh?

If you do, you gotta be clean.

'Cause even in hillbilly hell
we have standards.

What, I...? I don't get it.

I thought I'd say thank you
for doin' a great job.

So I thought I'd let you stay with me.
I mean, not with me!

But there. Not with me there,
but there in your own cozy cone.

- And I'd be in my cone, and it's...
- Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me.

If you want to stay
at the dirty impound, fine.

- I understand you criminal types.
- No, no, no, no. That's OK.

- Yeah, the Cozy Cone.
- [Sally] It's newly refurbished.

[Lightning chuckles] Yeah,
it's like a clever little twist.

The motel's made out of caution cones,
which, of course, cars try to avoid.

But now we're gonna stay in them.
That's funny.

Figure that all out on your own,
did you?

Cone number one, if you want.

Oh...

Hey, do I spy a little
pinstriping tattoo back there?

Oh... [chuckles]
That's just a... Oh!

[Both chuckle]

Oh, you saw that? Yeah.
Just gonna be going.

Gonna... Yeah.

- You know, I knew this girl Doreen.
- [Gasps]

Good-lookin' girl.

Looked just like a Jaguar,
only she was a truck!

You know, I used to crash into her,
just so I could spoke to her.

- What are you talking about?
- I don't know.

Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight,
'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you!

No, Mater, I gotta finish this road,
and I have to get out of here.

Well, that's all right,
Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt.

You probably couldn't handle it anyway.

Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater.

You know who you're talkin' to?
This is Lightning McQueen.

I can handle anything.

- [Whispering] I'm not doin' this.
- Come on. You'll love it! [chuckles]

- [Mater] Tractor-tippin's fun.
- [Lightning] This is ridiculous.

- [Tractors snore]
- [Mater] All right, listen.

When I say go, we go.
But don't let Frank catch you. Go!

Whoa! Wait! Who's Frank?

[Lightning whispering] Mater!

Wait, Mater!

OK, here's what you do.

You just sneak up in front of 'em,
and then honk.

And they do the rest. Watch this.

- [Honking loudly]
- Oh!

Oh... Oh! Oh... [mooing]

[Gas sloshing, backfiring]

[Laughing loudly]

I swear, tractors is so dumb!

I tell you what, buddy,
it don't get much better than this.

Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy.

- [Honking]
- Oh!

Oh! Oh... [mooing]

[Gas sloshing, backfiring]

[Laughing] I don't care who you are,
that's funny right there.

Oh, your turn, bud.

Mater, I can't.
I don't even have a horn.

- Baby.
- I'm not a baby.

[Clucking]

Fine. Stop! Stop, OK?
All right. I'll do something.

[Snoring]

- [Revving engine]
- Oh!

[All exclaiming and mooing]

[All gurgling]

[All backfiring]

[Angry mooing]

[Mooing]

That's Frank.

- [Bellowing angrily]
- [Shouting]

- [Mooing]
- [Engine revving]

[Mater laughing]

Run!

- Here he comes, look out!
- [Bellowing]

[Laughing] Whoa!